The Canterbury Tales and Freeze-Dried Tofu

This is the first time I've ever had freeze-dried tofu, which has (quite unexpectedly, I may add) been found in my bowl of instant noodles. At first I thought it was corn for it has a small square-ish shape, but upon closer exploration (a paradox - ha), I found it to be white and blocky rather than curved. The soup is rather good - Hot and Spicy flavor. I must warn you from the start, the rest of this might get boring and/or vexing since it will be a rant about my English class and general uber-analyzation of everything, which makes up a simplistic definition of "school"...First there is English. This class is like a stress test that's fucking out of control. I am seriously interested in what we are learning about (The Canterbury Tales) but am so drawn out by the consistent analysis and complete synopsis of every numbered line that the EEG will soon read "Fuck This" and my forehead will contact the faux-plastic desk. The teacher, Mrs. Hall, is a kind woman with a old-style hobby and a new-style in fashion. Mid-40's to early 50's with a lot of time left to exhaust the ideas in the books she 'teaches' about. My theory is this - if something was written, painted, said, expressed, or performed simply, then it should be interpreted as such - simply. There's no reason to butcher someone's writing or painting trying to discover "hidden" meanings and other miscellaneous crap. People only do this because they are bored with themselves. How do you think people discovered 'all that we know today about mathematics'? Someone had to seriously be bored enough to sit down, think "Besides all these million operations, what else can you do with numbers that I can bore the fuck out of other people with?!". Unfortunately, I think this to be truth. The unfortunate part about it is that fanatics got their hands on this shit, decided for themselves that everyone else should rejoice in the fact that, under certain parameters set up by the original creator, sin(x) should make waves and that y=1/x makes a fucked up graph where two curved lines (a 'hyperbola') will get closer and closer to its asymptotes but never touch. Despite the ludicrousity of the way this sounds, someone obviously thinks that this is going to impact our lives, therefore we must MEMORIZE it. What they should rather be focusing on is getting us to being able to apply it to how to fix a broken door which was kicked in when locked out, perhaps how to get a collector's coin out of sand without bringing in a backhoe, maybe even (god forbid) how to create your own morals to live by. I tried testing my theory of why most mathematics is obsolete and retarded in it's purest, and I just couldn't imagine a situation where I'd need it. I can't even fathom standing in line at Dairy Queen, finally reaching the front of the line, the order-taker asking me what I would like, and me saying aloud: "Well, based on the fact that y equals negative b squared over the sine of x multiplied by pi theta mu mu root 81698 angle XHJ cubed subtract the quantity of the square root of the tangent of the square of f of g of x equals 17.3, I think I'm in the mood for butterscotch." Same goes for English - both literature AND grammer. If we grow up with a certain vernacular language that everyone would undertand anyway, why is it even necessary to have standards even as there is a middle ground for things such as grammatical errors in advertising, grammatical errors in grammar books, and others spoken by our teachers of everyother subject other than English everyday? Why don't they just band together and submit that their existence is no longer necessary and the world can get along just fine using 'bad' grammar (which is completely relative to each person depending on their knowledge and perception). Shouldn't the real definition of 'good' grammar be what feels right? If this were the case, we wouldn't have to think of WHY the word 'who' doesn't fit where 'whom' does or why 'them' should be 'they' in certain, yet awkward-feeling, situations. It's all about simplicity, which was obviously forgotten about when God started handing out genes that had titles from Merck called "instant-retardation", "ill-logical bullshit", and "kiss my ass, you must know how to solve this equation or else you won't be able to purchase bananas!!". Hot and Spicy Noodle Bowl - $1.50 6 Pack Ramen Noodles - $0.99 Number of times you'll try to barf up all those carbs - countless. There are some things that dieting can solve, for everything else, there's tofu.